I've decided to get back in the game and start blogging again. But this time it's for the right reasons. It's not because I should or someone wants to know what I do and why - this time it's for me.
At the end of July, I competed in USA Nationals in Las Vegas for a chance at my pro card. I knew the competition would be tough, both physically and mentally with competitors that would all look great. It turned out to be much more difficult than I expected.
To see these girls at a semi-pro level was amazing and eye-opening. Much different than any local show that I had ever competed in. Not only were the girls conditioned very differently, but the attitudes of both the competitors and the backstage crew were I hate to put it -
overwhelming?
I arrived the day before the event to check in with the judges and figure out where all the pre-contest prep was taking place - the hair and makeup, backstage pump, etc. I was pleasantly surprised with how well run the pre-stage mandatory meetings went, but I was not so happy with the Jan Tana (hair and makeup) consultants. Not only did they seem to not care that I had not received any of my prepping products - they actually made me purchase things I had already purchased online but never received - they seemed very put out by the fact that I wondered how and what would happen... yes I had never received that information prior to arriving to my show. Upon returning to my appointment the night before the event, I was greeted by a man that told me to take off my clothes and follow him back to my "tent". Now I would not consider myself prude in any sense, but you think you could have warned us that a man or woman would be spraying you, and regardless you will be asked to strip in down in front of a man that hardly looked like a "consultants" there?! Yea, I would think so... to say the least. Haha - I'm not bitter about this piece of the story at all... =)
So to make a long story short - I walked backstage to see ~400 girls that all looked 150% better than any of overall winners at my previous shows. It was unreal. Scary, amazing and quite a learning experience. Needless to say, I did not place out of the 38 girls in my class - but I knew I walked into to this show with better conditioning than I had every had in the past. That was all I could ask for. I looked amazing, felt amazing and had more confidence on stage than other competitions. Each experience is one that we can learn from.
This experience demonstrated to me what my Coach had been saying all along -
Are you a figure competitor or an athlete?
Now he never meant any disrespect with this comment or to imply that figure was not an athletic sport because I'd be the first one to step up and disagree. But I finally understood what he was saying all along. There's a difference in the sport of figure that a traditional "athletic" sport. They judge you on your physique and posing, muscle symmetry and overall appearance. It doesn't matter if your muscles are conditioned for fast twitch or slow twitch fibers, whether or not you can bench press 10 lbs or 100lbs. Your conditioning was determined on how you pulled together all the pieces of your physique to make one complete package that made you exude a presence on stage. It didn't matter if I trained "harder" or "longer" or even "heavier" in my case... if the type of program you were on did not work as well in presenting this "package" you needed to try something different.
For me this was contrary to what I learned as an athlete. I was used to learning that if you have the talent, work hard enough, and want it enough you will beat the other competitor. I took this to mean, put in the effort and the win will come. But it's not just that - you have to do what I call "work smart". Know what your body will look like if you train with supersets of shoulders and biceps - know that with 20 more minutes of cardio a day you can lean out just enough to show your abs but not lose your muscle mass.
It's hard to think that you understand a sport and understand what your body is capable of an feel you are in tune with how it works - and then to walk on stage with 300 girls who know how to do it better. It's not about being "athletic" or being faster or stronger than your competitor - it's about who knows their body the best.
To be the best you need to know YOU the best.
I would argue that despite the way figure appears to an outside person - it's not about fitting into a mold with only one way to win. Sure - a lot of people look similar on stage, but it's not because that is the only way to win. What makes a real winner is taking what you have and molding yourself into someone who exudes confidence, symmetry and has learned to
train and
diet to show off the correct muscle tone and definition. Show what you work so hard for and be confident in your own skin.
It has been about one month since I competed and until today I had a bad taste in my mouth about the entire process of the USA's - how the competitors were treated both backstage and post-competition, frustrated about how far I felt I had come but yet still had so far to go, not to mention - whether or not I should push beyond the point of just a hobby and try to become competitive.
It wasn't until today that I decided this is what I want, this is what I want to put my whole heart and energy into -
This sport. As much as it will be difficult to put other sports to the side, I am training for something more important to me than most can understand. Yes - I won't be able to go out to happy hour very often, or have dim sum with the co-workers, but this is my life. I actually don't mind it. I never have been a person that lives to eat or who's ideal day consists of sleeping in all day (at least not most of the time) - I love to be active and be competitive and push myself to a level that not everyone can or even that I feel is achievable.
USA's proved that you can look both muscular, feminine, and healthy all at once. And I'm ready to start again and prove to myself that I can do it too.
